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Latest news from around the solar system 5/7/2022
Gladiator fights back on Rhea
It's been 8 years since the Rhea parliament banned the popular gladiator fights where combatants bat...
Titans offered surgery to remove sense of smell
The Titan government has offered a new solution to the Titan stench problem. All residents of Titan ...
Governor of Ganymede escapes from kidnappers
The governor of Ganymede who was kidnapped last week and tortured by communist rebels showed up toda...
Uruguayans furious over Argentine killing of Pluto capybara.
Last night drunk celebrating Argentines on one of the Pluto bases controlled by Argentina killed and...
Governor of Ganymede kidnapped by communist rebels
Earlier today a group of heavily armed communist rebels stormed the Ganymede capitol building and ab...
Martian psycho rights leader killed by psycho
Oleg Popov, leader of the Martian Association of the Acceptance of the Medically Psychotic, or MAAMP...
Uruguay takes control of Charon
Uruguay has now taken control of both bases on Charon in effect giving them control over all human c...
Mars psycho murders
Murders have been commonplace on Mars for decades, but some Earth governments are now saying enough ...
Lapetus imposes quarantine to stop syphilis outbreak
Lapetus authorities have issued a global quarantine order effective immediately to stop the recent s...
Argentina threatens Uruguay with nuclear war
An official statement from the pink house released this morning threatens Uruguay with war on Earth ...
This week in history
1989 - Plans announced for Moon highway
Plans for a new lunar highway were announced today connecting the two main lunar bases with what wil...
1984 - Disco lives on Mars
Disco may have been dead on Earth for a while, but in Brezhnevgrad, Mars it's the hottest thing. New...
1982 - Moon hotel named after impossible position
The moon hotel opened by Moon Pimp 3 years ago has been officially renamed ''Hotel Skull Crusher''. ...
2009 - Enceladus water goes on sale on Earth
Water imported from Enceladus went on sale worldwide last week priced at around USD 250 per half lit...
2003 - Rhea settled
The last of the large Saturn moons was settled today when a lander with 79 people on board touched d...
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